{"id":13106,"date":"2011-12-23T12:15:57","date_gmt":"2011-12-23T19:15:57","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.onlinebootycall.com\/blog\/?p=13106"},"modified":"2011-12-23T10:19:54","modified_gmt":"2011-12-23T17:19:54","slug":"dumb-criminal-alertman-ties-up-daughter-on-facebook","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.onlinebootycall.com\/blog\/dumb-criminal-alertman-ties-up-daughter-on-facebook\/","title":{"rendered":"Dumb Criminal Alert:Man Ties Up Daughter on Facebook"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>I don&#8217;t have kids, but I do have two younger brothers, so I know how absolutely unbearable children can be at times. Sometimes you just want to drive them out to the desert and leave them there while you take a g*ddamn shower in peace without them knocking on the door because they want you to make them macaroni and cheese. However, when you become a parent, a switch is supposed to flip in your head that tells you to have patience, because they are just kids. YOUR kids. So you take a shot of Jameson and make them their macaroni and cheese.<\/p>\n<p>And when you spank your kid and they &#8220;hit you back,&#8221; you don&#8217;t bound and gag them with duct tape and put it on Facebook. Unless you&#8217;re this dumb criminal, who is due in court today facing charges of child abuse.<\/p>\n<p>\u00a0<\/p>\n<p><iframe loading=\"lazy\" src=\"http:\/\/static.redlasso.com\/287535.html\" width=\"468\" height=\"360\" frameborder=\"0\" scrolling=\"no\"><\/iframe><\/p>\n<!--themify_builder_content-->\n<div id=\"themify_builder_content-13106\" data-postid=\"13106\" class=\"themify_builder_content themify_builder_content-13106 themify_builder tf_clear\">\n    <\/div>\n<!--\/themify_builder_content-->\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>I don&#8217;t have kids, but I do have two younger brothers, so I know how absolutely unbearable children can be at times. Sometimes you just want to drive them out to the desert and leave them there while you take a g*ddamn shower in peace without them knocking on the door because they want you [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":9,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[3996],"tags":[3268,7603,7604,1024,2404],"class_list":["post-13106","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-headlines-dating-news","tag-headlines","tag-man-ties-up-daughter-on-facebook","tag-man-ties-up-daughter-with-duct-tape","tag-news","tag-wtf","has-post-title","has-post-date","has-post-category","has-post-tag","has-post-comment","has-post-author",""],"builder_content":"","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.onlinebootycall.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/13106"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.onlinebootycall.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.onlinebootycall.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.onlinebootycall.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/9"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.onlinebootycall.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=13106"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/www.onlinebootycall.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/13106\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":13109,"href":"https:\/\/www.onlinebootycall.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/13106\/revisions\/13109"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.onlinebootycall.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=13106"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.onlinebootycall.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=13106"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.onlinebootycall.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=13106"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}