{"id":16378,"date":"2012-11-14T10:15:28","date_gmt":"2012-11-14T17:15:28","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.onlinebootycall.com\/blog\/?p=16378"},"modified":"2012-11-13T21:41:58","modified_gmt":"2012-11-14T04:41:58","slug":"reason-438-not-to-get-married","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.onlinebootycall.com\/blog\/reason-438-not-to-get-married\/","title":{"rendered":"Reason 438 Not to Get Married"},"content":{"rendered":"

There were a lot of people upset that Barack Obama won the election last week, thus ensuring another four years with a Democrat as Commander in Chief. Fine, whatever, it was expected. Especially for people who believe he is a Kenyan Muslim who wants to take away everyone’s guns and let men marry Popsicle sticks and personally give every woman in the country a third-trimester abortion. But hey – what’s done is done (line up for your abortions, ladies), and we all have to accept our new president, whether we’re happy about it or not. <\/p>\n

And hey – if you’re not happy, there are many things you can do to ease the frustration and anger. Ride a bike. Go to a shooting range. Cry in the shower. Walk a puppy. Give your mom a hug. Eat an entire Dominoes pizza. Write in your journal. Bake cupcakes! Go on a roller coaster. Hit a punching bag until your wrist breaks. Paint a picture. Watch twelve episodes of Ancient Aliens<\/i>. Run over your husband with a car.<\/p>\n

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There were a lot of people upset that Barack Obama won the election last week, thus ensuring another four years with a Democrat as Commander in Chief. Fine, whatever, it was expected. Especially for people who believe he is a Kenyan Muslim who wants to take away everyone’s guns and let men marry Popsicle sticks […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":9,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[3995],"tags":[59,8681,403,3822,9391,4735],"class_list":["post-16378","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-wtf-dating-news","tag-barack-obama","tag-election-2012","tag-obama","tag-reasons-not-to-get-married","tag-woman-runs-over-husband-because-obama-won","tag-wtf-news","has-post-title","has-post-date","has-post-category","has-post-tag","has-post-comment","has-post-author",""],"builder_content":"","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.onlinebootycall.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/16378"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.onlinebootycall.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.onlinebootycall.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.onlinebootycall.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/9"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.onlinebootycall.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=16378"}],"version-history":[{"count":5,"href":"https:\/\/www.onlinebootycall.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/16378\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":16384,"href":"https:\/\/www.onlinebootycall.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/16378\/revisions\/16384"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.onlinebootycall.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=16378"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.onlinebootycall.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=16378"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.onlinebootycall.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=16378"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}