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What IS His Secret?

GOD, I wish I wasn't just a toddler in the eighties. Apparently I missed out the best decade of all time. Jazzercise, cocaine, neon leggings in every color under the sun, The A-Team, and of course some of the best hair of any time period in the history of these United States. And that's just not for women - because according to the commercial above, even dudes with receding hairlines could get some legit, brillo-pad-lookin' locks, the kind that make the women you're awkwardly showering with just moan with excitement. Man, all that arm rubbing is getting me all hot and bothered. Happy Tuesday!