The WORST thing you can say when you match with someone on a dating app isn’t that you’re cheesy—it’s that you’re lazy. According to Time, common offenders like “hey,” “hi” (or the dreaded “sup?”) scream that someone sent the same copy-paste line to everyone else. And typos or spelling mistakes? Instant signal you didn’t bother trying.

Smart, Sexy, and Actually Worth a Reply

The antidote? A message that’s personal, playful, and not a snooze. Hily’s dating experts say standout openers made people feel relieved, like someone finally put in effort—and that’s how conversations go somewhere real. TIME

Here’s how to text like you’re as interesting as your pics say you are:

• Reference their profile detail: Shows you’re paying attention—not just swiping.
• Add humor or a light tease: Laughing together is the easiest way to break the ice.
• Challenge the vibe: A playful jab like “You may be the only one brave enough to match me…” keeps it fun.
• Cut the chase: Compliment, joke, or flirt—just skip the wall of text and move to actual convo.

Word count doesn’t capture the whole message. Time’s Gen Z report calls out “digital body language,” and that how you communicate online matters almost as much as IRL energy. Things like speed of reply, punctuation, and consistency say more than a “u up?” at 2 a.m.

Match that with presence. Openers are more powerful when you follow them up promptly, stay engaged, and show you can actually follow through—even if it’s forgetting to respond during life, showing up later says you’re engaged the next time around.

What Not to Say

Best to skip:

• “You’re hot” — Uncreative and an instant turn-off. Try harder!

• Overly personal or sexual lines — Creepy before it’s consensual.

• Generic one-liners — Sparking a convo with a question or a specific joke beats “Hey” every time. 

Ready to go beyond talking?

• If you hit a vibe fast, don’t drag it—drop, “Let’s grab a drink Friday?” and skip the messaging treadmill. Flow it into real life– OBC is about action, not small talk.

Join OBC today—because good messages deserve a good, fun follow-up.