Happy Monday after the most patriotic weekend ever! You might still be hungover, battling off two days of screaming USA while pounding shots of Jack Daniels – and there’s only one way to get rid of a hangover: morning sex, coffee, and a breakfast burrito (in THAT order guys, or you’re in for a bad time). However, in all your sleepiness and confusion, you may want to skip the ol’ cowgirl positions (woman-on-top), because one wrong move could literally break your penis.

Via VICE:

A group of Brazilian doctors recently published a paper in the academic journalAdvances in Urology identifying “woman-on-top” (aka cowgirl) as the most dangerous sex position in terms of the sheer number of dicks broken mid-fuck. Analyzing data from three accident and emergency units in the Brazilian city of Campinas over the past 13 years for clear cases of penile fractures (in which the ligament in the penis either tears or overextends, often with a loud, painful crack), the doctors determined that half of all such fractures came when women rode men, with 29 percent resulting from over-vigorous doggy-style and 21 percent resulting from missionary sex.

Feeling a little nauseous, guys? Yeah, us too. Keep it easy and stick to spooning sex today. No one wants to start their week with a PENILE FRACTURE.