Every few months, a new toxic dating buzzword swings onto the scene. We’ve lived through ghosting, breadcrumbing, and even orbiting (yep, that one’s real). But now? The internet is dragging something called monkey-barring—and honestly, it’s as messy as it sounds.

So what is it? Picture the monkey bars on a playground. To get across, you keep one hand on the last bar while reaching for the next. In dating terms, it’s when someone refuses to let go of their current partner until they’ve lined up the next one. It’s not exploration. It’s not openness. It’s just keeping someone on the hook while shopping for a replacement.

Here’s the deal: monkey-barring isn’t sexy, it’s sloppy. It’s not the thrill of casual dating or the honesty of polyamory—it’s sneaky, clingy, and fueled by the fear of being alone. Instead of taking a breather and figuring out what they actually want, monkey-barrers grip the “safe” option until something shinier comes along. And really, who wants to be somebody’s training wheels?

The truth is, letting go can feel scary. But it’s also freeing. Starting fresh—with no secret DMs, no “just in case” safety nets, no one stuck waiting in the wings—is way hotter than juggling exes and almosts. Swinging freely means you’re actually ready for whatever (or whoever) comes next.

And let’s be real: the only bar you should be holding onto is the one that serves cocktails.

Now, we’re not above a good rebound… so if you’re at the end of a relationship and are curious how you’ll get over it… this is the place to start for rebound dating. Just remember, on OBC and anywhere else, it’s better to find your next playmate after you’ve let go of the last branch. Because nothing kills sexy faster than baggage.