If you’re like me, the first time you heard Kesha’s hit single “Tik Tok,” you thought, sure, this is kinda catchy, but it would be a million times better if it was set to a mash up of old school William Shatner era Star Trek clips, you know? No? You didn’t think that? Well shut […]
There is NOTHING America likes more than charming stories of people falling in love despite unfortunate circumstances. There are entire shows dedicated to the cheesiness that is unplanned love. America also loves disfigured animals. That dog that could walk on two legs? Adorable! Cats with one eye? Awwwww. Elephants with no trunk? That doesn’t exist, […]
Did you know the World Cup is still going on? Crazy, right? I mean, there are like, 4 matches every single day. No, dude, I’m not kidding. Every single day. The reason you probably don’t know this is because the majority of the most anticipated matches start at like, 4 in the morning (or 6, […]
People today just don’t appreciate good performance art when they see it. They see a slightly pudgy guy with his shirt tucked into his khakis, giving it 100% with his awkward, rhythm-less dance in the middle aisle on a public metro and they think, “WTF,” instead of “Sweet mother of our Lord, we have been […]
Sure, Trojan is the best selling condom company, but let’s be honest, Durex takes the cake when it comes to ad campaigns. I guess Trojan’s pig commercial was okay, and those ones from the 90s that showed couples in the throes of ecstasy were like the first porn you ever saw which was AWESOME, but […]
Summertiiiiime, and the livin’s easy… That’s right, I just quoted Sublime, which is completely inappropriate at any other time of the year except this. THAT’S RIGHT, GUYS, Summer is officially, 100% here. The weather said it, school vacation said it, and now the lifeblood of our species, the constant in our lives, the mothah-effing Sun […]
Fine. You can play the violin phenomenally well and have a super freaking awesome white suit with tails and a matching piano and everything. So what, what does that make you? Some sort of internet superstar? Well… yep. Guess so.
What is the deal with Lakers fans? Seriously, you guys are almost as bad as Raiders fans these days, and combined, you’re basically just turning our entire state into one big freakshow of people who take professional sports more seriously than their jobs and families. Like, hooray! Our favorite sports team won! Let’s push over […]
Truth time: No, I did not wake up at 6:30 this morning to watch the USA vs Slovenia World Cup match, but from the screams of agony I heard from my living room, apparently there is quite a stir going on surrounding a foul called on Maurice Edu, USA World Cup player, that cost USA […]
Everyone seems to be abuzz these days after the announcement at E3 that Microsoft was releasing it’s new controller-less motion sensing system, eliminating the need for a controller all together. Awesome! I mean, how many times a day do you think, sure, this game is fun and all but BOY all this controller holding has […]
