It should be noted prior to this post that I drive what some might call a “piece of sh*t” car. It blew a cylinder so it now only goes about 45 on the freeway and it has those automatic seatbelts that always feel like they might decapitate you. So my understanding of cars is “wheels […]
Don’t get me wrong, I am all about love and honor and respect and remembrance of those lost, but I feel like if there IS an after life, if somehow I end up in heaven (hopefully… yikes) watching my friends down below and I see them MIX UP MY ASHES WITH POT AND THEN SMOKE […]
To think, of all the times we talked about the cruel consequences of marriage and divorce, we never thought of the children! We’re MONSTERS! Thanks to the Telegraph, though, we’ve been reminded that those who suffer most from divorce have no choice in it – the kiddos. According to a new study by the Demos […]
This is why I hate baseball. Not only is it boring and full of fat dudes and slow and monotonous and can end up going on for like TWENTY ONE INNINGS SOMETIMES, but in the rare case that something exciting DOES happen? It’s a f*cking baseball hitting you in the face. I feel your pain […]
59-year-old George Howard is a Kentucky man of many skills. Multi-tasking, though, apparently isn’t one of them. According to The Smoking Gun, he was arrested this morning when officers pulled him over for hitting a curb, and realized that he was driving, drinking a beer, and having sex all at the same time. Now to […]
Here is my problem with greeting cards: two years in a row, my grandmother bought me the same birthday card. It’s not that she was lazy and bought two of the same (and trust me, I considered it), it was that she honestly picked the same card two years in a row! Hallmark cards are […]
I don’t feel any real need to cover the MTV Video Music Awards with you, because honestly, I’m pretty sure that the entire offices of MTV have just been reduced to one computer spitting out algorithms that figure out the absolute cheapest, most hack sh*t teenagers are willing to watch, so why are we still […]
As you might have gauged from my lack of interest in rollercoasters, water slides, and steep hills, I am not a thrill seeker. I honestly get a little nervous stepping onto those moving sidewalk things in airports. But I can still APPRECIATE a great idea, whether or not I would ever set foot on it. […]
How NOT to Jump Into a Pool – watch more funny videos From the “People Failing at Easy Things” Vault comes this video, which reminds us that if anything, the end of summer is the end of drunken BBQs and the horrible, horrible choices that come with them. ::SHUDDER:: TGIF, Weekend Warriors! Don’t try that […]
It takes a lot to shock the iGeneration (that’s what I’m calling all of us 20-somethings who grew up with Netscape and watched it morph into iPad-compatible hardcore porn). We’re not easily disturbed, and actually are on a constant hunt to see something MORE strange, MORE disturbing, MORE brain-frying. Like, say, THIS. So the never-before-seen […]
