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WTF

WTF

Which is Grosser: Butt Vs Vag Smuggler

BCU

Just when I thought we had the most intense competition of all time (Great wall of Vagina vs Bomb Squad Vibrator) I cam across these two delightful news stories just this morning. It's like someone is smiling down on me and saying, "no, my child, it gets worse. Trust me." So we have Karin Mackaliunas …
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Woman Bites Off Her Boyfriend's Testicles

BCU

Imagine you are working a 911 dispatch center, and a guy calls, and he's in so much pain that he can barely speak, and you're like, "9-1-1 WHAT IS YOUR EMERGENCY?" and he's like, "MY... MY GIRLFRIEND. SHE... SHE DID SOMETHING." And then you're like, "okay sir, you have to tell me what's wrong so …
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Woman Finds Condom In Her Milk

BCU

File this under G for GOOD GOD THIS IS THE MOST DISGUSTING THING EVER. A woman in Sweden found a condom, a condom wrapper, and a plastic ring in the bottom of a carton of filmjölk, a sour-tasting fermented milk product popular in Sweden. FIRST OF ALL, let's talk about this "sour-tasting fermented milk product" …
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Best BCU Search Terms Volume 3

BCU

I frequently try and scour my memory to remember what life was like before the internet, before cell phones and text messaging and dating sites and Facebook. It's basically impossible. It's like trying to remember being born. However, I can occasionally take the time to remind myself how flat-out CRAZY some people on the internet …
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CRIME OFF!

BCU

I think it's hilarious that in an age where we have movies like Inside Man and The Town and other awesome criminal mastermind movies, that the only stories I ever hear about criminals is when they're doing something that not even my 12 year old brother would think made sense. The last few weeks have …
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Man Drives 40 Miles With Wife on Hood of Van

BCU

Reason #422 not to get married (or why not to do meth): your husband might drive across a city with you holding on for dear life to the hood of his car. According to Reuters, a man cracked out on methamphetamines was arrested last week for driving 40 miles at speeds of upwards of 100 …
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Pastor Arrested For Public Masturbation

BCU

Just when you thought that Charlie Sheen took the cake for the nuttiest weirdo out there, you find out about Reverend Grant Storms, the vehemently anti-gay Christian pastor from Louisiana, was found outside a children's playground masturbating in his van.According to the Huffington Post, two women spotted him looking a little suspicious by the park, …
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Thief Posts His Pics on Facebook

BCU

It's time for another edition of "Stories Behind the Crime Report."Meet Rodney Knight. A DC resident and aspiring party-planner, Rodney thought it would be a great idea to let the local residents know the excitement and fun that he could bring to a surprise birthday party (because surprise parties, of course, are the best type …
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Playboy Mansion Disease Outbreak

BCU

TOO... MANY... JOKES. CAN NOT... PICK. The DOMAINfest Global Conference hosted by the Playboy Mansion on February 3rd has caused some rather... unfortunate yields this week, as an outbreak of the disease legionellosis has officially sickened 170 attendees. The disease, which is known for "symptoms mostly consisting of fever, chills, general discomfort (malaise) and some …
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Man Hides Drugs in His Penis

BCU

You know, there has been some weeeeird sh*t on the internet this week. Cringe-worthy and disgusting (this woman who eats her own poop) to mind-bendingly scary (Bristol Palin saying she could run for office someday), you all should be thanking me for not forcing you to experience it even though I watched it just for …
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WTF

Best Crime Stories of the Week

BCU

There once was a time when crime was almost a noble venture. Stealing from the rich and giving to the poor! Pirating on the high seas! Being a jewel thief or a crazy serial killer like Jack the Ripper! These days, though, most criminals are just, well, retarded. Even aside from the fact that people …
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Burglars Snort Dog Ashes, Thought They Were Cocaine

BCU

Sometimes I think that people wake up one morning and just think, "You know what would be great? Getting on an episode of World's Dumbest Criminals! So great, and definitely good for our reputations at criminals."Then again, there is a reason they are given the title 'World's Dumbest', and it's because there was probably little …
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Man Kills Wife During 'Sexual Gun Play'

BCU

AND WE'RE BACK, with reason #12,720 that you should stay single: your husband might SHOOT YOU IN THE MIDDLE OF SEX.Now, I'm all for some kinkiness in the bedroom, and I can imagine that after many years together things tend to get stale and you might want to spice things up and try new things... …
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Groom Kills Bride, Best Man, Self at Wedding

BCU

It's beginning earlier and earlier these days: the mental disease I have dubbed "maritally induced insanity." Although it usually takes a few years for people to start going nuts and stabbing each other and singing Christmas carols at the cops, this man in Brazil shows that the crazy disorder can be tipped off just moments …
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Le Penis

BCU

Paris in the fall... so romantic, so beautiful, so aerial view of a penis drawn in the snow from the Eiffel tower. What a lovely way to wake up on a Wednesday morning, right? Happy hump day, readers!
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Man Castrates His Daughter's Boyfriend

BCU

dilligaf-rants.blogspot.com I'm sorry, let me rephrase that. A FORTY-SEVEN YEAR OLD man castrates his SEVENTEEN YEAR OLD daughter's FIFTY-SEVEN YEAR OLD boyfriend. So many different types of sevens that shouldn't be in the same sentence together, but it's true: In Germany (of course Germany) recently, Helmut Seifert received an anonymous phone call that his teen …
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Woman Bites Off Husband's Tongue

BCU

Ah, Christmas. The joy, the tradition, the cheer, and the 38,446th reason to stay single.The lovely Karen Lueders of Winsonsin (shown in the mug shot above) must not have been feeling the love of the holiday season Monday night, when she was arrested for allegedly biting off her husband's tongue and injuring his junk after …
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When You See It, You'll... Be Grossed Out.

BCU

You: "Oh look at this group of friends, having so much f-... wait, WAIT, is that girl naked?!!! Holy GOD she is! I mean, that's sort of really weird. That angle is just... and her boob is sort of... but I guess, I mean whatever she's- wait wait WAIT THAT IS FAT GIRL'S ARM.
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Have Sex With a Guy With a Mustache Day is Tomorrow

BCU

why don't you just sleep with this guy if you love hair so much? via eatliver.com What is the deal with our glorification of mustaches these days? What with Movember and the influx of hipsters rocking face fur that would make an Italian plumber jealous, I am constantly left wondering when the hell we time …
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Penis Tattoo Revenge

BCU

People express their anger in many ways. Some take constructive direction and paint, or play music, or write in a journal. Others throw chairs at each other at a 24-hour breakfast restaurant. However, I think we can say that this is the first time a person expressed their irritation at another human being by PERMANENTLY …
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