Headlines

I always feel bad when I'm writing a snarky anti-marriage article and it comes to my attention that there are allegations of abuse in the story. Whether or not I think marriage is a death trap has nothing to do with domestic abuse being completely horrific for anyone in the situation, especially when there are …

So, I don't know if you heard, and I'm fairly positive that if you aren't in California then you didn't hear, but yesterday San Diego County was affected by a 15 hour blackout that left 3 million + customers without power from about 3:30pm until the wee hours of the night.For someone who never expects …

Do we even need to be arguing our stance anymore? We've learned that kidnapping is more likely to happen by a close relative or friend than a complete stranger, and that you're safer in an airplane than a vehicle, can we also now accept the fact that you're most likely to be driven insane by …

59-year-old George Howard is a Kentucky man of many skills. Multi-tasking, though, apparently isn't one of them. According to The Smoking Gun, he was arrested this morning when officers pulled him over for hitting a curb, and realized that he was driving, drinking a beer, and having sex all at the same time.Now to be …

Now this is a slightly more pleasant case against marriage than our last post - according to the NewsHerald, a Florida man (oh hooray! The Floridian Freaks are out again!) is being charged with attempted murder and felony criminal mischief for driving through the wall of a Waffle House restaurant where his wife was working …

Remember like, less than three days ago when I told you I hadn't seen a really decent dumb criminal story in a long time and I thought maybe they were slowly Darwin-ing themselves out of the world? Well, turns out the dummies are SURVIVING, because I just learned that a woman in Pennsylvania is accused …

(Apparently this is People-Are-Racist Day. Sorry. I don't plan these things.)In "Fox News is Still A Racist and Pathetic Excuse for a Journalism Outlet" news, a recent headline by the "fair-and-balanced" website called President Obama's 50th birthday party a "Hip Hop BBQ," despite there actually being only one rapper there. According to Gawker, the actual …

There are great headlines, and there are awesome headlines. And although the above headline is unfortunate in that it announces a human being's death, I'm sure if the situation were reversed he'd be laughing at this too: I mean, come on, right? That is HILARIOUS. The story itself, doesn't get any more normal - according …

Gentleman, brace your junk - according to a report by Reuters, a California woman has been accused of drugging her estranged husband, chopping off his penis, and sticking it in the garbage disposal. Catherine Kieu Becker, 48, then called 911, and told police her husband "deserved it."According to Becker's husband, he went to lay down …